As you may or may not have noticed, that was a yell of frustration and anxiety. So, sometimes I read my sister's blog, which I love. But sometimes people I really don't like post on said blogs and make me really frustrated. I get REALLY sick of bigotry against my church. Is that wrong? I don't think so. They can decide whatever they want against us and it MUST be true because most of them know a case of it happening! As we all know, when something has happened once in a minority it's always true! RIGHT!? I don't know if I'm a truly open minded person, but I'm pretty sure I haven't made up my mind about everyone of a single race, gender, sexual orientation, ethnic origin, religious background, or any other sort of creed. It really bugs me when people have! To try to understand something more my sister wrote about, I followed a link to her blog. The post she linked to wasn't what made me cranky, it was one of the other posts about Mitt Romney. Now anyone can choose whether or not they like him. I kind of like him, I'm so sick of politics right now that I don't really care about who's president as long as they keep away from me, but to call him sexist because he's Mormon drives me crazy! There was something about abortion that she wrote about, too. About where the mother's life was 50/50 without an abortion, but that's not sexism, that is something about abortion. I can see getting cranky at him for advising if his advice was not asked for; I can see being offended that he said don't get it, despite doctors advice. This religion is FAITH based religion, if he believed through his faith that she would be fine, that's his prerogative as a religious leader to express that faith. Maybe he didn't do it in the way that which would be wisest, but he's a MAN. He does in fact make mistakes. If he didn't I would be worried, because there is no man that has ever or ever will be perfect in his earthly life. (for those of you worried right now, Christ was never a mere man, always heavenly and divine. He was mortal in body but eternal in mind, the veil was far thinner for he than for anyone else I believe)
Basically, why am I required to be open minded, and if not, "I am truly a horrible person." It drives me crazy. There is nothing in this life than a close minded person laying blame on someone for being close minded. Until you're ready to open your mind to all the possibilities on this earth, you have no room to judge. Since no man can possibly comprehend all possibilities of righteousness, wickedness, happiness, sorrow, courage, fear, faith, desire, greed, pride, jealousy, charity, or any other possible emotion, virtue, or sin. Then continue to seek and give comfort to those around you. Find the familiar to love, and the differences to respect. I'm not perfect in this at all. The first time I found myself as a minority in any way shape or form, I was uncomfortable. In time though, I was able to grow to love them and see how they are NOT at all different. As long as you are not building walls around yourself you can bring people together despite their walls. Most people are not strong enough to remain alone and indifferent when shown compassion and trust. Show that compassion and trust, let your own guard down sometimes. Stop hating and distrusting. Do everything within your power to love someone. Anyone. So a kindness to someone you've never met! It's fun. It's really hard. I used to be really good at it and I was the happiest(and most popular) I've ever been. Honestly, give someone a smile, or hold a door open! It's worth it. Just stop separating yourself from those that are different just because they are slightly different. You all have more in common than you have different. Even if you are the staunchest right-wing republican, you can find something to love in the most left-wing democrat. There is something to love and honor in everyone. No man is so far in the shadow he cannot turn back to the light. Just stop, please?
Well said.... I'll stop! :-P
ReplyDeleteAs a missionary I remember being surprised at the level of hatred that is leveled against us. I remember one particular instance, we were at some sort of community event (I don't remember specifically what it was) and some lady came up to us and said, "We talked about you in church today." I tried to get out of her what they talked about, and she would give specifics. But she made it clear that her pastor wanted everyone to know how vile we are, and that we should be hated. The thing that surprised me was not that they disagree with us, but that they were taught to hate. I guess I've always recognized that hate is part of the human condition. People do it without thinking. But it blew my mind, that there could be people who are thinking, planning, and teaching hatred.
ReplyDeleteI've heard that non members in Utah feel as if there is an institutionalized hatred towards them coming from our church. I often wonder how that can be, when I've never seen it taught and I've never seen it acted out. I do recognize that there are probably individual families who teach that. But the church as a whole teaches to reach out to our neighbors, especially to those not of our faith.
For myself, I find the thoughts and opinions of those who are different from me to be of great value. I have a really good friend who is Hindu. I love to discuss politics with him. I find it so interesting to see how our religious beliefs color our political beliefs. We often disagree but I think we both grow from the discussion.
I totally agree with what you said. There is reason to love everyone. Even if people disagree, they can still love each other. I have good friends that are not members of the church. I have good friends that are democrats. I have good friends that don't like Star Wars. (That last one is the hardest to believe.)
I find that when I disagree, I can often learn something from the opposing position. But even if I can't, I feel it's important to be respectful. I really like this quote from a book I recently read, "None of us has a monopoly on truth. But if we did, being right is a call to serve, not a license to vilify."
Anyway, thanks for your thoughts on this. They echo many feelings that I have felt.
I'm not sure which people specifically you're talking about... Did I link to something about abortion? I can't remember... Anyway...
ReplyDeleteMany of the people reading and commenting are very angry. They feel betrayed. Hurt. Alone. So they make gross overgeneralizations. My family has been amazing... that you haven't felt the need to prove me wrong or call me to repentance or disown me or shun me... is wonderfully odd. It doesn't make it okay for people to say the things they are saying, and maybe it will help you to understand where they are coming from. I have friends that have been disowned by family entirely. or told that they are just evil and disgusting sinners and following satan. or been told the world would be better if they were dead. And all of that backed up by scriptures and quotes from the church. They have been abused by the church. For them to heal, they need to talk about their pain.
I agree with you though... if we could all just love each other, let go of the need to have an "us" and a "them", there would be so much more peace. Love really is the answer. And I think you understand that better than most humans, which makes it even more difficult for you when you see the opposite happening.
I don't know if this helps... I'm really sad for your pain. As your big sister, I would like to protect you from everything. As a friend, I really REALLY appreciate hearing your thoughts. I'd love to talk about anything that is bothering you. I love you.
PS. As for the Mitt-haters... I don't think most of them really care WHAT religion he is, they don't like him, so they don't like his religion. (I was a Huntsman fan myself... bummed that no one else liked him.)
The hardest thing I've experienced was when my sweet kindergartener was discriminated against and hated (by his class grandma-so wrong on so many levels) because his parents were "mormon". It was the first time I'd experienced it and it was so different from what I'd been taught. And it was so wrong.
ReplyDeleteIt's made me try to be even more careful about the way I look at and treat others. So I guess it wasn't all bad.
I love that we're all different and I find hate confusing.
I hurt for Jen's friends.
And I appreciate your thoughts.
Last week I was on the playground and a girl came up to me and asked me what a Muslim was. I gave her the short answer that it was a religion. She asked a few questions then said, "Are Muslim's bad?" I told her that the religion didn't make anyone good or bad. I explained they followed a prophet named Muhammad that you could read about in their Quran which is like our Bible. It turned out she was asking questions because she was chatting with a girl who was Muslim and wondered if she would get in trouble for it. I told her that there are probably a lot of good things she could learn from her. (I also told her that if her parents didn't know about it, she should tell them-can't be too careful!)
ReplyDeleteI realized many children/people who have grown up in the post 911 era have similar ideas that all Muslims are bad. I know we are all different with many different ideas and beliefs but I like to think that we are more alike than we are different. We are all looking for the things that will give us peace and make us happy. Some may feel the need to put walls up and fight anyone who expresses an idea that is contrary to their own, but that is probably more because they feel their world is threatened by new ideas.
I, like you, believe there is something to love and honor in everyone. This life is too short to spend it hating others. I choose to look for the good or potential good in everyone.
Okay I have to share a funny story about my kids.
ReplyDeleteOne day while at dinner, they were in 1st and 2nd grades, my kids kept going on and on about how evil the Germans were. I guess they were learning about WWII. But I mean they just kept going and going all germans were EVIL.
When they were finished I said, "You know, we're german. I'm 1/8 and you're 1/16 and grandpa is 1/4 and his dad was 1/2. Are any of us evil?"
You should have seen their faces. It was confusion mixed with "NO" mixed with shock.
Priceless!
Then we had a nice conversation about Hitler's choices were wrong, many people chose to follow him and many were compelled to follow him out of fear but that does not make all germans bad.
Great teaching moment that they still talk about sometimes.
Just thought I'd share.
Carol, as a new poster and someone I don't see on a weekly to daily basis thank you for your thoughts! Loved them so very much! Thank you! Thanks all for your thoughts! ^_^
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